Talking To Myself

Talking to myself and i feel,
Despair.
What has gotten into me?
Perhaps i'm confused.
I cant see,
The air isn't there;
I wish i had someone to talk to,
So i wouldn't hear this voice anymore.

Why must i creep
Into the corner of my mind,
Where an echo turns to thought of suicide?
I can't stand this,
Go away.
I've been there before,
And i don't want to return.
Shutup!
Please!
I wish i'd never done it,
All of this;
It's left memories i can't let go,
They hurt,
Still burn in the back of my skull.
Will they ever leave me alone?

Maybe i want to die...
Maybe i should leave everyone...
Who could bare knowing,
They have a sick friend by their side?
I would do the favor,
Of saving you from myself;
At least one less crazy in the world, right?
I just wish i could've done better,
I've let my dreams wash away with the tears.

You would love me still, wouldn't you?
I'm sorry if i leave you wondering,
It's not my intention;
I'm sick, weak
And it pains me to leave,
But i have no choice.
It tells me i'm right,
That i ought to go;
To leave this place and heal my soul.

I loved you all with all my heart.
I've cried and begged to God these thoughts
Would one day go away,
Though it had been in vain;
I hear them countless times again and again.
Now all i ever do is wonder,
Wonder of all the yesterdays;
Sitting here with only them,
Talking to my wicked self.