My Turn

I’m no exception when it comes to deception
It caused me to hate my reflection so I take it in sections.
I’m too quiet for society’s sake
And I avoid putting my emotions at stake.
Honestly I just want something perfect
When I know I’m not worth it
And I want to destroy something lovely
That made you smile and still reminds you of me.
Until then I’ll force myself to believe
That one day I’ll eventually leave
Cuz I need to go out on my own
To find a place where I’m not so alone.
It’s like I can’t calm down when no one’s around
So I run as fast as I can
To forget the soft touch of your hand.
I’ve been trying but I can’t find what I’m missin
And it seems like no one’s open to listen.
So I pray to God that the paper always will
And hope one day my thoughts can hold still.
I’m just sayin I’m fuckin tired of that
So once I leave I don’t want to come back.
The truth is ever since she left me
I can’t help but feel empty.
I know it won’t make a difference
If I create a little more distance,
And it’s not that I haven’t found reasons to stay,
But those reasons always seem to push me away.
So I keep it to my god damn self
And pretend I don’t need no one else.
Cuz once all this bullshit runs out of time and out of my sight
I have no doubt in my mind it’ll all be alright.
But when I’m gone I want them to finally realize
The hidden look of desperate love in my eyes.
Cuz it’s their turn to want me around…
And it’s my turn to shoot em all down.