The World In Which Reality Falters

Sometimes I look at life as a dream and I wonder if I'm truely awake or if I'm still laying down in my bed not ready to wake up and welcome reality.Although I know which is which, at least I believe I do, sometimes I'm not sure if I am in reality or in her world. In her world, things are never what they seem, always leading into some ending to my life. Then I wake up in my world and find myself daydreaming excessivley, so I wonder to myself if I belong here. I can be staring straight at the man I love and still wonder who this is I'm staring at, even though I know him to be my boyfriend. When things like that happen I began to weep and I worry those I love and adore. Can reality be so cruel as to reject me from its whole being? Am I doomed to live in the world of another soul? What should I do? I limit myself to a few of my fantasies. I sleep less, I think more, I am stressed, and sad. Please, I wonder, is there another way I can be accepted into reality? I do not wish to stay in her world. Why? Why wouldn't I want to live in a world full of fantasy and fun? Because, I do not want to loose those I love in this world. Slowly I fade...

I began again. Sadly, those I love no longer remember who I am and I too have forgotten them in return. The new world that I have been reborn into is strange and cold. Loneliness seems to set into place, as a key role in part of this new world.....Again...I fade....not wishing to absorb this meaningless existance of life, whosever it might be...

My eyes open, I'm laying in my bed, the sunlight filters through the dusty blinds on the window. I look around the room, it is my room. As I go to stand, my feet connect with floor and I pass from my world. Am I to only be teased with the remnants of a once beautiful life? I ask god. He answers me, not in words but actions. I again awake to a dimmly sunlite room...and I smile " Thank you." For now I know I am in reality.